Seasons

After my disastrous relationship and break up with Matt I decided I had had enough. No more dating! I recognized that it was starting to become a distraction in my life and taking attention away from things, including my kids. I decided to just to focus on the relationships with myself, my family, and my friends. And no more drama! I deleted all my accounts on the dating apps and it was a great decision. Now let me clarify, if some guy should happen to cross my path and ask me out on a date I would probably say yes but no longer would I go out searching. Living in Brigham though means I really would not be dating. 

About a week into my no dating life I get a text out of the blue from a guy I met on Tinder. We actually had set up to go on a date a few months before and the day of he didn't text me until 10 pm that night. Because of that I just assumed he was after one thing and so I didn't respond and he never text me again. I told him what I was feeling and why I didn't text him back that night and he said that he wasn't about that and he really did want to go out and get to know me. Like a sucker I fell for it. Long story short we went out a couple of times, he kept telling me how interested he was in me and how he wanted to be exclusive. And then it happened...again. He ghosted me too! It started out with him just cancelling plans on me and then finally I told him I was fed up with his actions and that I was done. Never heard back from him. I have officially lost faith in the population of single men. There are many things that I don't understand about this new phenomenon of ghosting and if someone does then please enlighten me!

I think it's obvious that my resolve to not date was renewed.  This incident happened over a month ago and so far, so good. This is the longest I have not dated since I started dating a year ago and it's been soooo nice! Do I get lonely sometimes? Sure I do but I love doing whatever the heck I want on the days that I don't have my kids. I love that I'm not distracted while cooking dinner, getting my kids to bed, or anything else because I'm texting some guy. I can focus all my attention on the things that deserve it. I'm learning to love and appreciate this season of my life. Would I be willing to meet someone special and possibly get married again? Of course, but I've come to understand that I need to appreciate the opportunities and stage of life that I'm in now and not wishing it would be different. I can honestly say that right now I wouldn't want my life to be any different than it is right now and that feels amazing.